As I've writtten before, one of the foundational assumptions of Neuro Linguistic Programming is "There is no reality, there is only perception."  If you're a fan of Dr Phil McGraw, you'll know that it's also one of his personal mantras as well as one of his life laws in his book Life Strategies.  In fact, he dedicates an entire chapter of the book to it.

I know I've written about this topic on several occasions, but I'm struck by just how many people seem to struggle with the concept.  When NLP, mainstream psychology and quantum physics all converge to tell us the same thing, that reality is an illusion created and managed by our perception of the world around us, we really do need to start paying more attention.

Because when sombody says to you, "This is reality."

Or, "You need a reality check," whose perception of reality needs checking?

I recently shared a funny picture of Facebook that sparked this train of thought.  What instigated it was when a good friend and colleague asked the obvious question.  What do you call it when you're being honest about how you feel and they think you're joking?  I jokingly said "Their studpidity" but I should probably have more accurately said that it was more to do with their limited perception. 

And the point is that not all perceptions of what is reality are compatible.  That's because some people just aren't going to "get it", or more accurately, they're just not going to "get" you.  And what is almost tragically sad about this fact is that in what I have seen to be the majority of cases in my experience, is that they're just too lazy to try or make any real effort.

Then arrogance tends to set in, as a result of ignorance and laziness, and eventually they start wondering why they're not achieving what they want, why life is biting them so hard in the @$$, and why you and many others eventually want very little to do with them.  And all this after they've made a very specific point of telling you what reality really is.

So at this point I think the best course of action my friend might be able to take would be to walk away and just let them be.  That's only because despite quantum physics telling us that there is no such thing as solid mass, picking up that chair leg and swinging it at them is likey to result in some sort of injury because they're perception is just too limited to realize that the likelihood is that if they were able to perceive events correctly, then the chair leg would just pass through them.

Unfortunately though, most people just aren't that observant or accurate enough in their perceptions.

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    G'day everyone.  I'm an Aussie Life Coach, Clinical Hypnotist (  and author with a passion for making every relationship in our lives the best it can be.   I work at local, state, national and international levels.  I am also a Callahan Techniques Thought Field Therapy practitioner trained by Eugene Piccinotti TFT - dx, and I studied Neuro Linguistic Programming Master Practitioner Level (MNLP) under Steve G Jones at the American University of Neuro-Linguistic Programming
    (  In other words, as a coach, I'll use whatever I have to use to help you to make the changes you want to make.