Although a relationship breakup can be both harrowing and depressing, there is no law carved in stone to say that the relationship with that man or woman absolutely has to be over.  Even if the sudden dissolution of your relationship has left you feeling, to quote Hendrix, dazed and confused, and lonely, there is still a chance that you are eager to heal your wounds and jump right back on that relationship horse with your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend.  So if you're finding yourself asking yourself, "How can I win my ex back?" then there are a few things you need to know.  There are certain ways to act when your relationship breaks up, and if you're willing to learn them, and learn how to be aware of ways to create less strain on the relationship than there already is, then winning your ex back will be less difficult than ever.

Sometimes it can seem impossible to maintain a cheery attitude through the day after you've gone through a breakup, but many, many relationship experts tell us, repeatedly, that an attitude of optimism and confidence, regardless of the outcome, will take you a long way.  That being said, here are some of the ways in which a confident attitude can help you to answer the question, "How can I win my ex back?"

Keep your confidence - If you're asking the above question, then you really need, and I vehemently recommend that you remain confident (if you're one of those that say "I'm not a confident person anyway," there are an amazing number of affordable products out there that can help you).  Instead of sitting around feeling sorry for yourself and gloomy, throw everybody out of the pity party and keep yourself occupied.  Think of something that makes you happy and smile about that.  If you do that there is no way you can get upset about anything.  That will help to minimize or even put an end to any depressive feelings you may have.  This has the added benefit of allowing you to show yourself to your ex boyfriend or girlfriend  as a strong person who is more than capable of dealing with such a horrid emotional situation.  It also shows them that you are strong enough and capable enough to survive on your own.

Remain socially active - If getting back together with your ex is your main concern at the moment, you need to surround yourself with the right people.  Surround yourself with people who wish you well, people who are positive thinkers and who are good friends.  Put on a show for your ex, even the whole world, that all those people love you and appreciate having you around.  See it in your mind as the greatest show on earth (sorry, couldn't resist the classic movie reference).  Because the more people who feel good about having you present in their lives means that it's more likely that your ex will begin to see you in a new and completely different light.  Possibly even completely different to the way they have ever seen you.  All of a sudden, the realization may just hit him or her what a fantastic person you are, what a great catch you are, and that, to put it simply, they really shouldn't have let you go on the chance that you'd end up with somebody else.  This is one of the best ways to show yourself off to your ex in a new light.  (Remember the old saying about "Doing well is the best revenge")

Maintain a good appearance - I know this might sound a bit shallow to some of you but, those of you that remember the old proverb,” Clothes maketh the man."  They make the woman too.  Your appearance reflects your situation because it often reflects your mindset.  Pay attention to the way you're dressing, your shoes and your hair.  Pay attention to, even more importantly, the way you speak and the way you walk.  Talk like your word is law and walk down the street like you own it.  It's a cliche for a reason.  I know how hard these things can be to do after a breakup, but it is the best way to tell your ex and the rest of the world that you're going to be okay even if, on the inside, you're not right now.  It tells everyone that you don't need sympathy or to be patronized.  It tells your ex that you're a mature adult and if they want to be back together with you then they need to come in as a mature adult.

And if the worst happens and your ex wants to move on, then, that's okay because as a confident person someone else will gladly want to be with you.

10/23/2013 01:45:24

Thanks to your blog, I'm gonna create one now too, thank you.


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    G'day everyone.  I'm an Aussie Life Coach, Clinical Hypnotist (  and author with a passion for making every relationship in our lives the best it can be.   I work at local, state, national and international levels.  I am also a Callahan Techniques Thought Field Therapy practitioner trained by Eugene Piccinotti TFT - dx, and I studied Neuro Linguistic Programming Master Practitioner Level (MNLP) under Steve G Jones at the American University of Neuro-Linguistic Programming
    (  In other words, as a coach, I'll use whatever I have to use to help you to make the changes you want to make.